Thursday, September 22, 2011

Totally On Purpose: Telling Dad

In which Scott learns of his number 3 offspring and does not, in fact, jump out the window.

Dear Baby TOP,

It's still Thursday, August 11 as I write.

Daddy didn't get to know about you until yesterday because Elliott (you know him.... he's one of your big brothers... he's 5...) and I were traveling with Aunt Heather and her girls in Rochester. Daddy and Tommy (you know him.... he's your biggest brother.... he's 7...) are at camp and E & I needed to distract ourselves from missing them! Expecting a baby isn't the kind of news I thought Daddy would want to hear over the phone. He's not old, really, but information like this is best shared where emergency medical attention can be offered. Just in case.

The reason I was nervous about telling Daddy is that for years my joke has been "If I ever get pregnant again you'll see a Scott shaped hole in the wall." Now, Daddy loves babies, too. Truly. But he's more practical than I am about these things. Try not to freak out when I tell you this but, ummm, we're not rich. We are fine and not in danger of going hungry or anything, but (and please don't take offense to this) you small people are expensive! So, Daddy thinks of things like how we'll pay for diapers... and how we'll manage sleepless nights.... and worrying about whether the baby poops enough (or too much).... and whether or not the crib we bought for Tommy in 2004 has been recalled (it has)....

I saw Daddy briefly on Tuesday night at camp for dinner but decided that was NOT the venue to reveal you. So, I waited until Wednesday morning when he was home for his day off. He came in the door, hugged Elliott for a bit and I brought him into the bedroom and told him to sit down. I had considered a million ways to tell him the news but I knew that this was probably not the time to be clever. So I said, "Sit down. There's no way to tell you but to tell you... I'm pregnant."

Now, I've seen some big things in my life. I've been the Grand Canyon. I've climbed great mountains. I've been to the top of the Sears Tower. But never, I mean NEVER, have I seen anything as big as Daddy's eyes when I told him that. Seriously wish I had a camera handy.

He was shocked. See, your brothers were planned. We had Tommy because we owned a house, had good jobs and were heading up to age 30. We had Elliott because we found a bigger house and wanted Tommy to have a sibling fairly close to his age. We have you because.... well, I guess because we are LUCKY!

After his initial reaction (dumbfounded speechlessness) he wanted to know how sure I was. I thought this might be coming so I had purchased a 2-pack of pregnancy tests. I drank a bunch of water and managed to take a second test. It was immediately positive.... No need to wait 2 minutes (as instructed) for this thing!

He gradually regained his verbal capacity and I learned some important things. Daddy has been wistful for babies and toddlers. He had just been watching a video of Tommy & Elliott from the Christmas when T was 2 years old and E was 6 months. He wasn't thinking that we should have a do-it-yourself-er, but he WAS thinking that adoption might be a good idea for us.

So, he's still surprised and shocked, but his heart was already wide open for you. Sheesh I'm lucky.

I love that guy you call Daddy. I love him like crazy.

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