Tuesday, October 19, 2010

New - very important - social movement

I think it's time to take a stand on a really important issue. I, like many of you, have been in denial long enough. We all need to stand up and change our own ways so that the world will be a better place. It's troubling to me that I have waited so long to address this social blight. Okay, it's really a private blight. But it's time to make it stop.

I looked in my bathroom cabinets today and I was appalled. Countless bottles of shampoo, conditioner, body wash, lotion.... with a exceptionally small amount left. They sit there. Collecting dust. Taking up valuable real estate. Begging for a return to the shower or counter where they can be utilized by their owner. Can you hear their fruity essence imploring for your attention? Don't turn away. I know. It's hard to dwell on this disturbing mental image. But I need you to picture it so that you can understand the change I'm asking of myself.

Over 2-dozen victims.... Haven't they suffered long enough?

And don't look at me that way. You do it, too. You get almost finished with your shampoo or conditioner or body wash or whatever and you add that item to the shopping list. You go to the store and you sniff and you read labels and you locate the perfect new product. It's going to smell good. It's going to make you want to achieve and be your most wonderful self. You'll be gorgeous. You'll feel gorgeous. You'll be at least 15% smarter and 37% more productive. Your sex life will be 67.4% more satisfying.

You get it home and bring it to the bathroom. But sitting there - still - is your old shampoo. Your old conditioner. Your old body wash. But you are SO over Avocado Peppermint. You cannot go another day with that scent on your skin. You have to move on. Because, dammit, you have found THEE solution to every problem in your life! And it is inside this beautiful bottle of Mango Orange Blossom.

So, the Avocado Peppermint goes in the cupboard. (You can't throw it away, of course... that would be wasting it!) And the Avocado Peppermint joins the Juniper Breeze and the Raspberry Melon and the Vanilla Rosebud Heaven and the Cucumber Jack-o-Lantern Surprise...... You now have at least a dozen bottles of mostly used hair and body care products in your cupboard. You, unbeknownst to you, are the Prison keeper and all of your products are in lock down.

That ends TODAY.

Today I invite you to join me on a quest. Join me and stand up for change. Stand up for a world free of prematurely tossed aside hair care and body products.

On this day, I vow to cease my purchase of new skin or hair care products until I have used up the minuscule amounts that I have in the built up containers in my bathroom cupboards. And in the drawers. And probably in the medicine cabinet... I vow that, even if my initial dream of life-altering deliciousness upon application has faded like Lindsey Lohan's dream of a respectable image, I will use that Blueberry Lilac Strawmelon Body Mousse until it is gone. I vow that I will celebrate the emptying of each bottle with the ceremonial tossing of the lid and recycling of the bottle. I vow that as soon I as I am finished with these orphaned products - sometime in 2013, most likely - I will keep a bathroom free of partially used products.

And I ask you to join me.


LET'S GET ALL OUR MOSTLY-USED PRODUCTS TOGETHER AND SWAP!! I could really go for a Mocha Latte ("Now with caffeine!") Body Wash right now.

No. No. Join me. The long bathroom nightmare must come to an end.


  1. Ahhh..you so amuse me, Phoebe. I hate to admit it, but I'm a waster. Yessirree bob, I toss that miniscule amount of Avocado Peppermint. I don't let it stand proud in the cabinet or on the counter...I think, perhaps, I'm fighting those inevitable Strong genes that seem to make every female in the family save EVERYTHING...I'm making my small stand against clutter by being a waster. There, I've said it. I feel much better now ;)

  2. Waste Not Want Not. Good for you. Here are a couple of tips on how to use those up without messing with your head.

    Use up some of those nice smelling soaps to hand wash delicates, a sweater, hand made mittens, sox or scarves. Take a bubble bath with some of that good smelling shampoo.

  3. Ah, but Phoebe, am I but a lonely being who squeezes every last drop from the tube o' tinted moisturizer (2 for the price of one) and body wash that I didn't even pick out (no one knows what to get their sister-in-law, much less their sister, for Christmas) because it makes buying that new product ever so much sweeter, so joyful?
    Am I the only one who tears magazines ads out and stashes them for later product buying (only to discover said product never quite 'made it' and is therefore not really on the hypothetical shelves). And, yes, I do use those tinsy bottles I swiped the last time I actually did go somewhere that had them, before moving on to bigger, not always better (love the Aveena rosemary mint from Hampton Inn)and therefore remind myself not to buy giant size bottles so I can sow my oats more frequently on other brands, smells (and flavors??). Wonderful blog my friend, (I actually thought it was going to be about the amount of plastic....'nother blog maybe?)

  4. Ha ha! I thought my ex sister-in-law was the only one who did this. Taking a shower at my brother's house required a PhD in chemistry. I had to ask my nieces what each bottle was for...so my shower was always delayed at least 30 minutes as we wander through the plethora of products. Most of the bottles did not contain enough for even one shower but they were never thrown away!

  5. I made it my New Year's Resolution last winter to use up all of my lip balm before I bought more. It's been a rough road but I'm getting there. Perseverance et al.