Tuesday, February 9, 2010

(Internal) Holy War

Here's what's bugging me today:

Nobody really has any crontrol on their life. Your relationship with the Lord is defined by the FAITH you have that He has everything under control. He is the one laying out the road for you, your just the traveler. So when you think that 'you' have made a mistake, they are made for a reason. Its just the Lords way of bringing you closer to him!

That's today's Facebook post of a fairly distant relative (through marriage) whom I've never met. She seems like a nice girl, if far more conservative than me. But this sentiment bugs me SO much. Why do people think that everything is up to God? HELLO??? FREE WILL! You choose, you deal with the consequences. You can get a nudge from God, sure, I buy that. You can even call on God to help you make good choices (though a part of me says this type of prayer is merely self reflection and has little to do with a Higher Power....) But to say that when I screw up it's the Almighty's doing. No way!

And my screw ups are bad enough... losing patience with my kids, yelling, not picking up that trash that I could very easily pull over and take care of on the side of the road, coveting my neighbor's Wii.....

But think about the "Christians" who beat the snot out of their kids? Or start horrible wars? "Well, musta been God's plan, and shucks! I feel closer to him now. Good thing I stole all that money from my company!"


This is what irritates me and makes me want to turn away from religion, especially Christianity. I do not want to be lumped in with a group of people who think everything is preordained and that they have no control over their destiny.

Okay. I'm breathing now.... I guess I don't think most Christians I know feel this way. BUT... who's winning the media war right now? The reasonable Christians who understand that Their Way is not The Only Way? Or, the ones who propagate this nonsense which completely removes any form of responsibility from their hands... oh, and by the way, damns anyone who doesn't believe what they believe to Hell?

Gaaaah! I know it shouldn't matter but if I'm going to label myself a Christian I really don't want to have to explain what that means to me.


  1. Being a Christian is between you and God. Period. Wrestling with hypocrisy is part of the journey.

  2. Well, Phoebe, I feel ya on this one--but, I must admit, that while I might have chosen to phrase it differently than your now even-further distant relative...I've experienced enough full-circle voodoo magic moments to make me believe there's a design for everyone and something greater will help you find it if you've lost your way. (Because sometimes it isn't our fault that we can't make the choices to take us to where we need to be...but, I'm not bitter.) Sooner or later, whether your choosing-the-crap outta life or choosing to not-choose, it is up to you. Always has been, always will be, true...but, I for one believe, that with our without the all mighty Bible...deep down there's a little conversation that keeps us all on track and even at those times when the entire country seems like they've lost their f#cking minds, proves that if you're one of the ones listening, serendipity is definitely cosmically cliche in an unbelievably spiritual way. (I, for one, have met enough half-witted self-proclaimed religious automatons to know that just like they spew cliches that will never seem quite appropriate to their unfulfilled lives, they preach and judge and remain content with ignorance because they truly don't want to know better. Their mental shortcuts don't have to be yours.) In the end, the reality is unequivocal...tomorrow is coming with or without you behind the wheel. I'm here to say, even though there will be lessons in all of the wrong turns--mistakes, screw-ups if you will...the scenery sucks from the back seat, I'd much rather drive thank you.

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  4. Sorry about that I had missed a word and had to delete it.
    Hi Im coming over from Loreleis blog to see yours! Hi Im Janet and Im a Christian too. I so agree with what youve here. I hate that bla bla phrase "everything happens for a reason" I could scream when I hear that. Like ppl dont think about cause and effect or what they did to warrant things. I agree free will is our choice and were not puppets acting it all out. Its called walking with HIM and seeking Him and yes He can direct our paths but hey I dont agree with that facebook excerpt either!