Totally On Purpose: Continued Neglect Edition

Dear Baby TOP,

I can't say sorry enough. I don't even remember the last time I wrote to you. You are getting plenty of attention, I promise, but it's just not translating to blog posts. You can add this to the list of reasons I'm a horrible mother when you're old enough to decide I'm a horrible mother.

That's you in Florida a few weeks ago. No good belly shots since then. Yes. It IS neglectful parenting....

Anyhooo, today you are 37-weeks cooked. Technically, you are "full term" but I'm not deluding myself that you are coming anytime soon. Hopefully we will meet you sometime in the next 3 weeks. Any more than that and I might *start* to get cranky. (Har, har. I said "start". I'm hilarious. And cranky already.)

So, I've had some worries on my mind about you lately. Most of them were eased last night at my doctor's appointment. Ya see, I haven't gained a ton of weight since January or so and my fundal height has not been cruising at the expected rate. I wasn't too, too worried about the weight gain but I have some experience with a smaller-than-expected fundal measurement and it wasn't fun.

The fundal height is measured in centimeters and is, basically, the length of the uterus. Ideally, the fundal height matches the number of weeks pregnant a person is. My fundal height, while increasing, was not growing at the rate expected. And while this issue has been on my mind for a couple of months, I haven't had a midwife appointment without at least 3 kids in tow and was never able to fully address how anxious this whole thing was making me.


Back story: when I was about 38 weeks with Tommy (back in 1807, I think it was!) I went for a normal appointment only to be told I needed to high tail it for an ultrasound because my fundal measurement was too small. The ultrasound showed that my amniotic fluid index was much too low and I was immediately put on bed rest. Not cool! I was teaching at the time and I utterly unprepared to toss my chaos on to someone else at that point. And also... I'm not really good at the whole bed rest thing. From that point I needed to go to the hospital 2 or 3 times a week with a bag packed just in case they decided they needed to induce. So, in the 19 days between the "oh, crud" diagnosis and the delivery day, I went to the hospital about 5 times and *maybe* was going to have a baby. I know I know. It ain't cancer or a stroke but it was HIGHLY stressful.Given that Tommy's (4 days past due date) inducement/delivery was pretty traumatic and the bumpy road he faces today, I jumped to conclusions and made what I'm sure are coincidences in causal relationships.

Cut to you. Last night Mary Midwife measured me three times (just to be sure) and you were 37cm, 34cm, and 37cm. I felt good about that. She confirmed what Erica said last week that your head is VERY low, which I am also very happy to hear.

Speaking of low and the consequences thereof, I've noticed (sorry to be gross) that when I go to the bathroom (678 times a day, give or take) I have to shift around a bit so your head doesn't block the exit for my pee. Sometimes there's a lot more in there than the initial flow would suggest. Biology meets physics. Fascinating! TMI? Sure. But still. Interesting, right??

Another "phew" last night was that my Group B Strep Test came back negative. It's not a huge problem if it's positive (it was with Tommy & Elliott) but if it is, Mamas have to go on IV antibiotics during labor so it doesn't pass to the fetus. This means (knock wood) that I won't have to be on IV during labor. I just assumed that I would be positive again and I'm happy to say that (once again) I don't know what I'm talking about.

Finally last night, Mary felt around and guesstimated that you are about 6.5 pounds. I know, it seems silly that she would be able to tell but the day before Elliott was born she guessed he was 7.5. He came out exactly 7lb 8oz. She is GOOD! So, knowing that if you are a little early you're already not-scary-small is a big relief. Good job in there, TOP!

Speaking of early, I had a dream a few nights ago that you were born on March 28th. That, too, would be unexpected since both your brothers were late. But, since you haven't done ANYTHING like they did, I guess I shouldn't be surprised if you turn up on the early side.

Guess what? We still don't know what we are going to call you. I have some ideas. Daddy has some ideas. And there's even a few that we both can live with.... But still nothing that both of us love. So, maybe you're going to be called TOP after all!!